The Things You Must Do To Make People Like You
The basics of getting people to like us are pretty simple: be nice, be considerate, be a decent person. But, there are also many smaller, more discreet things we can do that can have a huge effect on how others perceive us.
These are little we can every day.
Give them a try and you may find yourself becoming much more popular, as follows:
1. Use a Person’s Name
We all love the sound of our own name. Learn names and make use of them. Always use an individual’s name in a conversation. A classic from Dale Carnegie’s famous book How to Win Friends and Influence People, this tried-and-true technique will increase your fan base.
2. Smile with Feeling
People are at the cores very social creatures. As humans, we use social interaction as a tool for feedback, and we make a lot of conscious and subconscious choices based on how others engage with and respond to us.
When someone offers a huge grin brimming with authenticity, happiness rubs off on its receivers. There have been many studies showing how mood, whether positive or negative, spreads between individuals. When your positive attitude brightens someone else’s day, that person will love you for it.
You can show you’re listening to someone through body language; positioning your body to face someone and mirroring his or her stance, eye contact, and verbal confirmation.
4. Verbal Confirmation aka Active Listening
Many psychology books refer to this technique as “active listening.” Active listening revolves around demonstrating your listening skills by repeating segments of what an individual has said to you.
Back and forth dialogue can go a long way to make people like us more. It makes the other individual feel as though you really are paying attention.
5. Conversation Recall, Prove You are Paying Attention.
To really show someone you have been paying attention, bring up a topic that the person mentioned earlier. It says more that you can recall and show interest in even the small happenings in another person’s life.
6. Sincere Compliments and Plentiful Praise
Self-improvement expert Dale Carnegie tells us individuals crave authentic appreciation. This is very different from empty flattery, which most people are adept at detecting. Most people do not like being pandered to. What people really want is sincere appreciation , to be recognized and appreciated for their efforts.
In addition to giving people sincere appreciation, it is important to be generous with your praise. It feels great to be told you have performed a job well. When an individual does something right, say so. It will not be forgotten.
7. Handle Criticism With Tact
Be generous with your praise, and be stingy with your criticism. People have delicate egos, and even a slight word of condemnation can wound someone’s pride. Sure, correction will be necessary at times, but it should always have a purpose and be handled with care. If someone makes an error, do not call that person out in front of a group. Be discreet, be delicate. Consider offering dishing out praise before and after a criticism.
The less finger-pointing, the better. Aim to be always gentle with criticism and only offer it when it is really needed.
8. Avoid Issuing Orders — Ask Questions Instead
No one enjoys being bossed around. You can get the same result from asking a question as you can by giving an order. The outcome may be the same, but the individual’s feeling and attitude can vary greatly depending on your approach.
9. Be a Real Person
People like to see character and authenticity. While classic business doctrine pushes the importance of an Alpha male stance, shoulder back, chin up, strong handshake, it is easy to go overboard and come off fake.
Instead, be confident but respectful.
Some cooperation experts suggest stepping toward a person and bending slightly forward when you are introduced, in a gesture of a bow. These kinds of gestures can go a long way toward making people think more highly of you.
10. Become an Expert at Storytelling
People love a good story, and great stories require sophisticated storytellers. Storytelling is an art form that requires understanding of language and pacing. Master the fine oral tradition of storytelling and people will flock to you.
11. Physical touch.
It has been shown that very subtle physical touch makes individuals feel more connected . A great example is gently touching someone’s forearm with your left hand while shaking hands with your right hand, I did that when I met Ronald Reagan in 1980, we became friends, it is a great way to finish up a conversation.
12. Ask for advice.
Asking someone for advice is, somewhat surprisingly, a great strategy for getting people to like you. Asking for advice shows that you value the other person’s opinion and demonstrates respect. Everyone likes to feel needed and important. When you make someone feel better about himself or herself, that person will most certainly end up liking you for it.
13. Avoid clichés.
Instead of saying “nice to meet you”s at the conclusion of conversation, add some kind of variation to make you memorable, even in a small way. Try something like “I have really enjoyed talking with you today” or “It’s been a real pleasure.” Be yourself.
14. Ask questions.
Asking people questions about their lives, their interests, their passions is a great way to get good guy points in their friendship books. People are egocentric they love to talk about themselves. When you are asking questions and getting people to talk about themselves, they will leave the conversation thinking you are “the coolest” as he or she will think better of you just for indulging his or her ego.
So, try these 14 simple things, and you will see how they effect others in a very powerful way.